Choosing Community

Last week we talked about Personality and defined it. When you know your personality you can start to know how you fit in community. People who like to challenge personality tests, are usually the same people who like to challenge community. Oftentimes they are not well liked in community. They can seem like the bad boys or bad girls. 

A few years back I remember a person who told me he liked to challenge personality tests. He told me they didn’t work for him. He also liked to prove his point and argue with everyone. He had developed a behavior modality. 

I had another friend who was married. She started helping him with his business. 

As I was starting my business, I saw the similarities and the difference in what we were doing. 

I saw how intelligent he was but something inside me told me to be cautious with him. 

I saw how talented she was at connecting community. 

He had a unique gift of pissing people off, “the bad boy, I don’t care what you think of me attitude.”

He saw her gift and was exploiting it promising her things. He connected into her personality. 

Needless to say, wisdom did not visit this relationship and she lost money, got burned and he took advantage of her. 

The friendship ended. I only heard her side. I didn’t get involved. 

Many times people can be attracted to the bad person persona. Why that is, I don’t know and people will walk away wounded. 

Now I do not judge the situation, but what I do say is this, be aware of who you are, what you want and what you need. He was speaking who he was, she was speaking who she was. But were they listening to each other?

He saw her talents and wanted to use them to help his business. She was willing to give them, but in the end it cost her more than what she was willing to pay. I know this because she told me. 

He didn’t seem to care about the relationship because he never mentioned a problem. These are behaviors that can affect the puzzle pieces of how we fit in community. 

Both have things to offer this world it is knowing how to navigate their communication style, it is see how they and I connected in community. It is knowing how I wanted to connect with them in community. In other words what it boils down to is how do you choose to connect in community?

You have the choice?

For more information you can always check out our books and other products on The Needs Languages webpage.